diversified | Blessed by light and burden of shadows. [ closed ]

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Blessed by light and burden of shadows. [ closed ]

WHO Shannon Vaughn (

privatematter), Eli Delacroix (

aspectional).
WHAT Eli is an idiot; Shannon is curious. How exactly does D/s go down when you're not to the Having Sex stage in the relationship yet?
WHEN Late 1990. Seven months after Jumpscapades.
WHERE Shannon's place.

Shannon was anxious. Not in a bad way, but the anticipatory way that everyone got when something new and exciting was going up and there was no way it could go badly, but predicting the end outcome was almost impossible. It was a great feeling, but one that left Shannon feeling like a teen heading out to prom instead of a grown man getting ready to have fun with his boyfriend and potentially make some hilariously heartfelt gestures to express his trust in Eli. That was probably something he didn't do enough in general, actually.

Breakfast had been something simple. Pancakes, fresh cut fruit and sausage. Eli had come over pretty early to get ready, talking over the generalities of what they were going to do while the specifics were to wait for after they were done. Well, now they were done and sitting on the couch, and Shannon's leg was jiggling even under the hand he had placed on his knee to keep himself still. Lacey had wandered off after breakfast, stomach filled with her own food and presumably was napping on the foot of the bed in Shannon's room. Probably for the better, really.

"So," he said, ignoring the obvious tell he was giving off. If Eli took it for misapprehension, then Shannon was going to definitely lean over and smack him. "Where do we start?"

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If Shannon was anxious, then Eli was a bundle of nerves, even more so than he usually was. It had been some time since Eli had done a scene and he had never really done one with anybody that mattered as much as Shannon does to him. He wanted this to go as smoothly as possible and didn't want to screw this up for Shannon, especially since he seemed interested in it once he realized what it was.

Talking during breakfast had calmed him down, but that was from nearly crackling with electricity to his powers not fluctuating with his emotions. Which was an improvement, but not really much of one. Once on the couch, Eli noticed Shannon's leg jiggling and instinctively put his hand over Shannon's to stop it.

"Let's start with what you don't want to do. Things that you can think of that you would automatically say no to," Eli started calmly, easing himself into the proper mindset for what was going to happen. He couldn't be nervous now, it would only cause problems later on. "This will help both of us in the long run, so I don't end up hurting you."

The jittering stilled. Shannon's fingers curled automatically, then he shifted his hand around to take Eli's in his own. It was obvious they were both nervous: this wasn't exactly dinner and a movie on the weekend. Or even their own version of dinner and the radio, or long talk involving current politics going down on the other side of the world. Shannon was pretty sure it would involve not a whole lot of talking on his own end, which was definitely going to be something different. Not that Shannon was a very loud person in general but he tended to have something to say about a whole lot of things.

"What I don't want?" Shannon tilted his head, gears beginning to spin as he considered numerous different scenarios. There were a lot of things he could be nervous to do, but nothing he would say was an outright no. Not with Eli in charge, anyway. Except... "Don't cover my ears. Or plug my nose. Or... anything like that."

Some people might have found sensory deprivation sexy or sensual or something sappy like that. Shannon figured it probably was. But he'd been living that life for as long as he had a life to live and adding to it did not sound like an interesting or fun thing to do. He could trust Eli with anything, but starting out somewhere that might seem like a natural course of action due to his own blindness was not where Shannon wanted to go. Perhaps that was defeating the purpose of the whole 'lack of a control' thing. Was it? There were plenty of other things to do, after all. Giving it a moment of further thought, he shrugged and added, "That's about it. Have your way with me, sir."

For now, he allowed Shannon to take his hand. Once they started, this wouldn't be acceptable and he'd indulge Shannon for now. They were both nervous and needed the comfort the touch gave them. He looked over at him and squeezed his hand lightly. It'll be okay and neither of them will have any problems.

"That's it? No sensory deprivation besides what you have naturally?" If that was all Shannon would outright say no to, then Eli had a lot of wiggle room and no place to really start. Oh well, he'd figure it out. "I can work with that."

At being called sir, Eli's body language changed dramatically and he pulled his hand from Shannon's to cup the back of Shannon's neck in a loose hold. "Stand up and follow me." His voice had changed slightly, sounding more commanding without being unnatural. It looked like they were starting, Eli leading Shannon to the entrance area so they wouldn't have to worry about furniture. When they got there, Eli let go of Shannon's neck. "Strip down to your underwear and then get down your knees."

That was it. Shannon really couldn't think of anything else that might set him off or make him too reluctant to continue with whatever Eli had planned. He considered himself the kind of person who could go with the flow and adapt when necessary as long as he had some say in the adjustment. It still hadn't completely sunk in that the point of their exercise was going to be adjusting because Eli wanted it, not because Shannon did.

When Eli seemed to shift demeanor, Shannon straightened to match. His shoulders squared out and he automatically tilted his head back in the hold as if to encourage Eli's hand up just a slight bit more into his hair. "Good thing I don't get cold," he said in amusement as he unbuttoned his shirt and slipped off his pants. Even after they moved, Shannon knew exactly where they were and shifted to toss the clothes on the corner table to keep them out of the way.

He knelt down, hand reaching out at his side to balance himself on the floor while he shifted numerous times to find some comfortable position while sitting. This wasn't his usual style and resting back on his heels was not as easy as he'd thought it would be, so he kept his hands beside his knees for the extra support. "Like this?" he asked, head tilted back once again to address Eli.

It was obvious from the beginning that Shannon was going to need some work. He expected that there would be some out of ignorance, but he couldn't help but facepalm at how much he needed. Eli had dealt with subs who tested him due to his age and the thought that he was inexperienced, but he had never dealt with a sub during their first time before. The basic concept was the same, only Eli could be more patient.

Once Shannon's on his knees, Eli knenlt down and grabbed his chin, yanking it down sharply so that he faced the floor. "There are rules you must remember: do not speak unless I have given you permission, never look up at me, and you are not to do anything unless I have ordered it. Do you understand?"

Shannon tilted his head when Eli knelt down to his level, then let out a quick gasp of surprise at the redirection. He blinked a few times, glasses dislodged from the motion and his brow furrowed in thought as he processed what rules he had already broken. It was probably going to be some sort of breach to fix his glasses, but how was he supposed to answer without breaking at least one of those rules? Shannon could nod, but Eli hadn't ordered him to; he could speak out loud and confirm, but he'd just said not to speak. Looking up at him seemed kind of pointless to rule out since he wasn't actually looking, but he was still interested and very willing to keep at it. He wouldn't look.

Taking a deep breath to let his rhythm even out into something calm, Shannon waited. It was a bit of a zero sum game, so he figured the best option was not to answer at all. By following the rules laid out, that counted as a acknowledgment and understanding, right?

"When I ask you a direct question, you are expected to answer," Eli said calmly as he fixed Shannon's glasses for him. He knew he was trying, so he couldn't really be angry with him. This was the learning process, he didn't expect for Shannon to know it all immediately. "The exception to these rules is your safe word. Whenever you want to stop, you can say it."

He let go of Shannon's chin and studied him for a moment to see if he would move out of the position. "Do you have any questions about the rules?"

Shannon uttered a soft "Oh," at the clarification. There was a soft smile at Eli fixing the errant eyewear, and then his head tilted to the side, but not up, as he thought about the question. His only other movement was to shift how he was seated, feet still not in the greatest position for a prolonged amount of time. Everything was straight forward so far: let Eli puppet him, but answer anything asked directly to him in order for Eli to know where he was at.

"No," he said. While he turned his head straight and kept his chin down as if resetting to where Eli left him, he rolled his shoulders out in an unconscious movement. "I'm good."

"No, sir," Eli chided gently, but he leaned in and kissed him on the cheek as a reward anyway. He stood up and moved around him so that he could adjust Shannon's feet into a more comfortable position. Once that was done, he studied Shannon for a long moment. "You are not to move from that position. If you do, I will punish you. If you don't, I will reward you. Do I make myself clear?"

He needed to get changed. Eli couldn't stand being a Dom in his normal clothes and had brought something like else to wear for this. It would be a good chance to see if Shannon could take orders well and if he could be patient. He would have to find his limits eventually and starting from the beginning was a good plan.

The readjustment helped a surprising amount, and Shannon let himself lean back into something he figured would last longer. It was pretty pleasing to know he hadn't totally messed up already, even if he wasn't getting everything right, either. Shannon had made sure Eli knew he really had no experience with any of this despite his work with the police; violent crimes, no problem, they handed him those to help on all the time. More sexual in nature, however, and they balked at letting some untrained civilian in on such a sensitive case.

If they were going to play a waiting game, then Shannon could do that. He only wished he'd had the forethought to turn on the radio before they started. If he was alone with his thoughts for too long, they started to get pretty jumbled up and distracting. That was probably part of the test.

"Yes, sir," he said. There was only a small bit of hesitance before he remembered to add the title.

The only way that Shannon could truly screw things up is if he didn't learn from his mistakes and since that wasn't the case, that meant that Eli was going to slowly teach Shannon what he needed to learn. He knew that his boyfriend was inexperienced and wasn't going to punish him for it. They all had to be novices at some point, even Eli.

When Shannon responded, Eli walked over to his bag in its usual out of the way corner and went into the bathroom to change. Off went his normal clothes and on went the leather. Knee high boots, tight pants, shirt, jacket, and gloves. All of it was leather and Eli immediately felt more relaxed, always feeling off whenever he had to Dom in his street clothes. It was one of the reasons why Eli knew that he'd have problems with a 24/7 relationship.

Once dressed, Eli picked up his bag and walked back towards where he had left Shannon, stopping before he got there so that he could watch him. He's not trying to be stealthy and his boots are much louder than his normal shoes, so he knows Shannon is aware of him nearby, but is happy to let him wonder about what's going on for a moment before walking over all the way and kneeling down behind him, not touching him at all and deciding to not say a thing just yet.

True to his word, Shannon waited. It wasn't a hard task. When he heard Eli leaving the room, Shannon let his shoulders slump and his head dip against his chest. He wasn't trying to put on a show for Eli, but attentiveness was always appreciated, right? He wondered what else was appreciated, if there was anything else Shannon could do to make this more enjoyable for Eli as well. There was a whole lot of focus on the sub in these scenarios, as far as Shannon could tell, so it was probably more gratifying to have orders followed instead of fought against. That wasn't the game they were playing. This was about trust, and it was about safety. Both of which Shannon felt right now, even if Eli was taking his time in whatever he had gone off to do.

Still, he waited. At the tickle in the back of his throat, Shannon frowned. That was probably going to be a problem, his unusually high requirement to stay hydrated thanks to his body's natural temperature. Maybe he and Eli could work something out, a different kind of safe word where he could break off and get a drink if he needed one. There was no real need for that yet, but it was something he was going to have to keep an eye on.

When Eli came clomping back (he'd changed his shoes?), Shannon instinctively turned his head toward the noise to better ascertain it. He didn't look up, didn't much move aside from his mild fidgets. He did, however, follow Eli's movement and let the confusion show on his face when Eli merely... settled behind him. The longer Eli waited there in silence, the more Shannon started to take in. His heat against Shannon's back, for one, a pleasant heat that felt a little more solid than the gentle waves that came off anyone else. Smell hit him next and it surprised him. He knew that smell: leather. For someone who had grown up around fine sports equipment, leather was a comforting material, something familiar and yet still exotic enough to keep him from simply getting used to it. It was pretty heavy, not just some small trinket or accessory, but enough to make him breathe it in deeply and almost sigh it back out. Okay, so there was a lot of leather involved. Now what was Eli doing with it?

It was always interesting watching Shannon take in his surroundings, especially in this situation. That was why he went silent instead of automatically praising him for doing as ordered, wanting to let him notice the change of clothes for himself instead of showing it off. He noticed when Shannon smelled the leather and smiled, standing up and moving back in front of him.

"You stayed right where I left you. Good," he said evenly as he bent down and ran a gloved finger down the side of Shannon's face, almost as if he was petting him. Eli then grabbed his chin and tilted it upwards so that he could look at his face. "Stand up. You're getting your reward."

Oh, Eli was wearing gloves, too. Shannon leaned into the supple softness of the finger trailing down his face, then found himself blinking a few times as he was suddenly turned toward his boyfriend. He grinned at the mention of a reward, wondering what Eli would come up with for good behavior, and used his hands as leverage to swing himself back onto his feet. His toes curled and he rolled his heels once or twice as if shaking off the kneeling position entirely.

There was no question in what Eli said, so Shannon held still once he was on his feet and said nothing else. It was pretty relaxing, actually, not having anything to do but what he was told, even if they hadn't gotten very far yet or done anything more than sit, stay, stand.

Eli was glad that Shannon seemed to enjoy the gloves and made a mental note to keep them for future scenes. For now though, he leaned in carefully to kiss him while he put both hands in Shannon's hair, fingers threading through it as if to touch ever last strand of hair on his head. He knew how much Shannon liked it and Eli thought that would definitely be a good reward for him.

But that couldn't go on forever, so soon enough, Eli pulled away, breaking the kiss and removing his hands from Shannon's hair. He watched his reaction to that ending carefully before he decided to speak. "You liked my gloves," he said, his tone somewhat playful. It wasn't a question because Eli knew he liked them and didn't need to waste time asking about that. "Would you like to find out what else I'm wearing for you?"

It was definitely a great reward. Shannon reacted instinctively to the kiss, to the leather-covered hands in his hair, and his own hands came up to cup at Eli's face to hold him there. As he usually did when Eli played with his hair, he made a small kneading motion with his fingers against the side of Eli's neck where they lay. He was breathless by the time Eli pulled back, a soft smile making itself at home on his lips.

Licking his lips in a bit of a daze after the brief connection, Shannon nodded. The idea that Eli had changed entirely, his whole body now giving off the musty scent of the leather thick in the air, made his smile grow. He caught himself a second later and said, "Yes, sir. Of course."

If it was any other moment, Eli would have stopped Shannon from touching him, but he was aware of how he was whenever his hair was touched and didn't take any action against the movement. The smile confirmed that Eli was right on the reward and he couldn't help but smile back. That was a good sign for continuing on.

He gently took hold of Shannon's hands and pulled them away from himself, placing them against Shannon's chest to let him know that they weren't supposed to be where he put them. It was more of a reminder than a warning, knowing that there was going to be a few missteps on the way through this and that they'd go through them together slowly and didn't want to risk taking a few steps in the wrong direction by pushing too hard.

Leaning back into Shannon's space, still not letting his body touch him, he moved so that his mouth was close to Shannon's ear, his hand reaching up to touch his shoulder as if to keep himself balanced. "Then it would make me very happy if you would find out." As he said that, he once again took a hold of one of Shannon's hands, but this time he placed it on his leather covered chest, giving him permission to touch him.

There was a very visible thought process when Eli arranged Shannon's hands the first time. His brow furrowed as he was pulled away, eyes unconsciously searching for an answer in his mind, then they widened just enough to look like a lightbulb had gone off in his head. Of course, he wasn't supposed to touch Eli unless he was told. That one was going to be difficult, but it reminded him of the other rules and he let his head dip down.

When his hand met the leather adorning Eli, it automatically curled up, applying some pressure to the material while pressing the sensation right into his fingertips. He lightened his touch, letting his fingers trail down to Eli's abdomen and then back up to his collar bone and followed it along to the hand resting on Shannon's shoulder. When he got there, he wound his hand around the gloved one and tilted his head to breathe the scent in; his other hand had come out and splayed against Eli's chest. The light give in the tough hide, the soft texture come from wearing it in just right until it was for Eli and Eli alone. His hand wandered further to the side and found extra bulk, a material that folded away from Eli's body instead of into it. His hand twitched, then he shifted from the shirt to the jacket and began to feel it out for buckles or pockets, buttons or zippers, something to give it more pizazz and give him a better image of what Eli had adorned himself in. Lots and lots of leather, obviously, but what sort?

Perhaps it was because he was distracted, or perhaps it was because he was getting a hang of the rules, but Shannon was incredibly quiet during his inspection. His attention was devoted to it, using all of his senses to catalog what outfit Eli had deemed appropriate for this experiment.

The thought process was what Eli wanted and when Shannon lowered his head again, he kissed him on the cheek to praise him for remembering. Eli wanted to be a kind Dom for Shannon and he was going to stick to praising him for good behavior over punishments for bad behavior when he could help it. Anything too bad and Eli would have to punish him, but he hoped Shannon would behave well enough to not warrant that.

His breath catches slightly at Shannon's examinations, mostly at how focused on it he is. It was beautiful to him and he merely watched him as he devoted his attention to what Eli was wearing. If he was an inexperienced Dom, he knew he would have definitely tried shifting Shannon's focus away from the clothes he wore to the person wearing them. Thankfully, he wasn't and knew that it would be best to be patient. He'll get that focus on him eventually and it'd definitely be worth the wait. The jacket Eli wore was simple with shallow pockets and buttons instead of a zipper. He didn't want to have anything that could catch on things, so he picked this instead of his more elaborate jackets.

Quiet was perfectly acceptable for the task and Eli wasn't going to pull him out of his examination of the outfit. When he was done, he would ask him about his findings, but until then, they could stay in silence during this.

With one hand already checking the jacket, Shannon brought his other hand to it as well, feeling out if there were any differences or emblems that might be on one side or another. His fingers stuttered at the stitching he occasionally found, then lingered on both the buttons on one side and the receiving buttonholes on the other. Once he was satisfied that he had pieced together the jacket, Shannon let his hands trail further south while lowering himself back onto his knees. Those pants were definitely enticing; just the light brush to determine the give and consistency of the leather told him how tightly they were clinging to Eli's body. He brushed his fingers upward for just a moment, feeling the space between waistband and hips to confirm, then let himself move on to figure out the shape and type of pants. Did they have pockets? Belt loops? They definitely had some stitching that he was more than happy to trail his fingers along, following down the outside of Eli's leg. Once, he paused to squeeze it between his fingers to test for any sort of give down the line and kept his smile tame when it seemed there was nothing to be left for the imagination anywhere.

He flinched, a slight hitch in his breath and paused in surprise when he was met with the top of the boots. They were much higher on Eli's calf than Shannon was expecting, and both hands moved to feel out one shoe instead of working from the outside in as he had been doing before. There was some kind of tongue on the outside, an extra flap going along the entire front center of the boot, and working outward told him there were numerous buckles keeping it on. There were plenty of metal studs, too, but Shannon figured those to be decoration when picking and prodding at them yielded no results.

Quietly, without forethought or concern for what Eli might do for the presumptive motion, he began unfastening the buckles to find out what lay underneath. Was this simply for show or did it actually keep the boot on? Was there anything to be found behind the flap? His fingers worked deftly, lingered when he caught the flap between his fingers, then moved on to the next all down one side at a time. Although he moved with surety, haste was not his goal; it was the sensation, the understanding, the calmness spreading through him as he simply took in everything Eli was in front of him. That was what he found important in the current moment. There was nothing else to worry about, nothing else to do but focus on the task set out for him.

Shannon going down on his knees along with examining his pants led to a very uncomfortable situation for Eli. It was a major relief that Shannon kept his hands away from the crotch of the pants, otherwise Shannon would have found out very easily that Eli was getting turned on by this. Their relationship didn't involve sex and Eli really didn't want to make this scene uncomfortable by Shannon noticing.

The pants were as simple as the jacket and the shirt. They had no pockets and there were only a pair of belt loops that seemed more for putting the pants on than holding a belt in them. If Shannon could see, they really would leave nothing to the imagination. They really seemed like a second skin more than a pair of pants.

Eli watched carefully as Shannon got to the boots and immediately refocused on them. He had no plans to interrupt his examination of them and instead got down on one knee without moving the boot Shannon was so focused on. All he wanted to do was watch Shannon work on finding out more about his outfit while Eli plotted about what he was going to do next. Seeing him examine things so intently with his hands had given him an idea and he smiled.

There was a whisper of sounds at his ears. Shannon hesitated at the buckles when Eli knelt down, feeling the motion against the air currents and hearing all of that leather crinkling and moaning softly, almost like a sigh. His head tilted upward, canting to the side almost like a dog trying to take in the noise. As he opened his mouth to comment, it hit him that he was about to break the rules again. His mouth snapped shut and he turned his head back down. Remembering that he wasn't supposed to 'look' up was a practice of discipline rather than common sense when it was only about what Eli had asked rather than any real change in his perception.

After fiddling with the last buckle, the tongue finally fell away. Running his hand up and down the newly revealed area, Shannon discovered there were numerous crisscrosses of laced string keeping the boot on. This was definitely the most complicated part of Eli's outfit and Shannon was meticulous in taking it apart little by little until he knew just what every piece involved. He tugged lightly at the knots in the top, freeing them and loosening the lacework all the way down to the top of Eli's foot until he could push away the inner tongue and feel along the rest of the pantleg through the latticework of shoelace. As his Dom was now bent down to watch him, Shannon let his fingers return upward to feel the pull of the pants against Eli's knee, just to see how much tighter they could get there. He scraped his nails against the area for the sensation, then brought his hand back down.

Shannon grinned when he reached the bottom of the leg near Eli's ankle, finally feeling skin freed of the leather. He let his hand rest there, rubbing gently at the skin he had found in amused contentment. Part of him had wondered if Eli had truly and completely covered himself in leather, including some kind of socks. He was gratified to know there was still Eli underneath it all.

Eli definitely noticed when Shannon stopped himself from breaking the rules and fixed his mistakes before Eli could call him on it. That was definitely a good sign that Shannon remembered the rules and that he just needed time for them to be automatic instead of having to force himself into doing it.

It was also obvious that the boots were Shannon's favorite part of the outfit with how long he took taking a boot apart and unlacing it. The touch on bare skin was unexpected and he exhaled sharply. He didn't have leather socks, but once he finds out Shannon thinks that, he will probably go out and buy some for next time.

"Tell me what you think of what I'm wearing," he started once he was sure Shannon was done, "and fix the boot you undid."

Hearing Eli's reaction, Shannon couldn't help but grin. He let his fingers trail over the bare bridge of Eli's foot one more time before he began to realign the inner tongue and then started to tighten the laces all the way back up to the top. It almost felt like his fingers were moving of their own accord, requiring little input from Shannon to finish what he had started. A comforting warmth was working its way up his arms, settling down in his chest where he definitely welcomed it.

He hummed quietly, thoughtfully. "I think it's fantastic," he said. He tied the knot off on the lace, tied another one for good measure, then let his hands trail around the outside of the boot while he retrieved the outer cover to begin reattaching it to the buckles. "You're gorgeous in it. Everything fits you so well. And you weren't going to tell me about this," he scoffed softly. "You're ridiculous sometimes, you know that?"

He looked down at his boot momentarily to check that Shannon wasn't having any problems. Since he appeared to be lacing them up and putting the rest of the boot on properly, Eli knew that he had this taken care of. He was pleased that Shannon liked the outfit, but he frowned at the last bit, reaching out to take Shannon's chin and tilt it upwards.

"Watch your tone," Eli said sharply, his tone hinting that he wasn't pleased by this. Shannon was allowed to talk, yes, but there was a certain way of speaking to a Dom as a sub and that wasn't it. Expecting that he got the warning, he tilted his head back down gently and let go of his chin. "If you don't behave, then I will have to discard my plans to let you dress me for next time."

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